Ulma-aeyo

“Ulma-aeyo? (How much is this?)” I ask, holding up a carrot.

“Ee Chun.” The old woman answers.

That is more expensive than the other venders’ prices, so I lay it back down and straighten up. This is Garak Market: a vast sprawling open air food market with vender after vender selling everything from apples to squid to barley to spinach. Each seller sits with their wares spread on the ground before them and hawks them loudly as trucks rumble by and the buyers straggle from one awning to the next. I take in the scene for an instant, but in my mind’s eye I am no longer in Seoul. The buildings grow poorer, the street turns to dirt, the chatter around me blurs into Spanish. In front of me I see a ragged boy with tousled, dark hair looking longingly at the fruit spread out on the sidewalk. “¿Tienes hambre? (Are you hungry?)” I ask him.

“Sí, Señorita.” He answers.

In my imagination, I turn to the vender and buy him something to eat. He smiles and thanks me for his new wealth. “Odiae-gayo?” The venders around me call the greeting in Korean, trying to get my attention. Once again the street is paved and the venders are oriental. The child has vanished.

“Martha, come on, let’s go.” Mommy tugs on my sleeve and we move on. “What were you thinking about?” She asks as we make our way past the grain section to the green veggies.

What was I thinking about? How can I explain that? “Nothing.” I answer.

I’ve always had a vivid imagination, maybe too vivid. I can really create a scene so real that I almost live in a different world sometimes. I feel as if I’ve really walked the streets of Chicago, wandered in the slums of India, lived in Morocco, visited Brazil, and (most recently) been to Colombia when in reality, I’ve only imagined it. Why these certain places? Street children. Los niños de las calles. Since I was a little girl of five or six I’ve dreamed of working with street kids. The country I’m thinking of has changed, the age of the children has shifted over the years, but the focus remains the same. For years I’ve imagined the city streets, thought up plans for starting farms for them to live on, organized feeding programs in my mind, and talked to imaginary children. “I’m going to start an orphanage” I remember telling people when I was five. “It’ll be nice orphanage with lots of games. I’ll teach them to read and all about the Bible.”

Now that I am almost ready to go out on my own, the dream has grown stronger than ever. The children of the street are calling to me. But here I am in Korea. Do I wish Korea had street kids? No of course not. But I know that somewhere there are orphans running the streets and they need someone to come and help them. How I wish I were there! Now, I bide my time and create dream scenes as I walk the streets of Seoul, but someday the dreams will be real. Someday I’ll get my hands into the work that God has raised me up for and called me to.

In a Patriotic Moment...

I sighed in frustration and banged my hand on the table, making all the dishes jump. “If she wanted Koreans, she shouldn’t have hired Americans!”

One of the most frustrating things in the world is to have someone expect you to switch cultures at the drop of a hat. “You are not in America. You must act in Korean way now.” She had said. Did she realize everything that meant?

But it made me wonder, what was it that she wanted? What exactly was this stuff in my brain that she wanted me to drop – this thing called culture? I’ve always admired Patriotism and loved the stories of the founding fathers of our country. But there is more to it. What are the values of America that I miss when I’m elsewhere? Here is the list that I’ve compiled:

1. Independence. I know it sounds like quoting the party line, but it isn’t. How many times have I said “I’d rather do it myself or not at all”? If I’m making food, I can add the salt myself. If I’m drawing a picture, you can keep your pencil to yourself. If I’m writing, you can hold your comments till I’m ready for them. We take pride in work we’ve done on our own. On standing alone. On holding our own separate view. “Everyone is entitled to their own opinions.” Have you ever thought about what a beautiful and very American statement that is? But I am crossing into the next section.

2. Individuality. “We hold these truths to be self evident: That every man is created equal and endowed by our Creator with certain inalienable rights. Among these are: Life, Liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.” These are words that our country is built on. Surely you have the words “Every child deserves a family.” Do you realize that not every country thinks that way? That in South America, street kids are routinely shot because they are a nuisance? People are always saying “Look at abortion! We are loosing our sanctity of the individual.” But do you realize that in Korea, abortion isn’t an issue? It’s an accepted fact! I remember well that when we were in China, there were two mining accidents: One in the US and one in China. In China there were two hundred minors killed. A few weeks later, the mine was reopened for work. Minors are disposable – it’s better to sacrifice them for the sake of quick progress than impose safety rules. In America, there were thirteen minors trapped underground. There was a humungous effort to dig down and send in a rescue. Everyone held their breath as they waited to hear if they were dead or alive. In the end, twelve were dead and one was alive. BUT, it was worth all the effort for the one life saved. I remember the wondering look on the Chinese students’ faces and they tried to comprehend the value Americans put on that one life. In Korea, handicaps are an embarrassment. If you are blind they lock you away where no one has to see you. In America, we make special arrangements in concerts, churches, departments stores, etc. for the visually impaired.

3. The right to speak out. “The tallest tree in the forest is the first to be blown down.” It’s an old Chinese proverb and explains a lot of their culture. Go with the flow and don’t rock the boat or you’re a goner. Not so in America. “It’s your own country so change it!” is the rule of the day. People always say, “Our country has SO many problems that other countries don’t have.” I beg to differ. Yes, we have many problems. But other countries have them too. Why don’t you hear about them? Cause they don’t air their dirty laundry to the world like we do. And why not? Because they aren’t in a constant scramble to fix everything like we are. Everyone in America has an opinion and they are all yelling at the government and each other to fix this or that or the other. But, in the end there IS something done (usually). In the end, the mess is mostly sorted out and everyone ends up if not happy – appeased. Then we are off to the next rough spot. A few days ago I was reading an article that said, “It is time that America quit ignoring and glossing over its social problems.” That made me laugh. When was the last time you said to someone “What is the answer to gang violence?” or “What is your opinion on the Hispanic immigration?” and they just answered you “I have no opinion.” Or “That’s not really an issue.”? If something is not really being resolved, it more likely to be a problem of too many cooks spoiling the broth than a problem of neglect. In America, everyone is expected to think for themselves and come up with their own opinions on every issue. Everyone is expected to have their own plan of action to solve the world’s problems – whether the plan will work or not is the main issue.

America has problems. I know that. But I love my country for trying to fix the problems, for talking everything out in the open, for valuing each person, for putting personal character ahead of education level or social status. I am American. I am who I am, so help me God. Nothing is going to turn me Korean or Chinese or any other culture.